"Oh I'm not Syrian" Said the DJ "I'm from Holland."
"Oh! No wonder you've got good taste! Where from Holland?" I asked
"Rotterdam
" He respondedThursday, 29th October
I walked out of the sausage festival with my friends from Dubai at 1 am after Above & Beyond ended their awesome live mix. Abu Dhabi's clubbing scene has sky rocketed! Proof: Crowd consisting of 99.9% men, and 0.1% women. The men were sweaty, horny (for anything btw), and weird. My ass was groped and squeezed.
"It's still 1 a.m.! I can't believe we'll go home now!" The girls complained.
"Let's bounce to another venue" Responded Syrian boy
So we head to Cubes. A tiny local bar/club in Abu Dhabi where Asian-pussy hungry Englishmen reside for cheap BJ's and unprotected sex. The music was pretty good, and my group's female to male ratio was ideal for them to let us in. 4 girls. 3 guys. Perfect! (Welcome to UAE).
As I walk down the stairs to enter the low-ceiling club, I can hear awesome tech house beats playing. The DJ looks fairly young and fresh. Could it be? Has Abu Dhabi's club owners finally woken up to proper Electronic music??
The music was too good and he kept delivering one track after another. I can hear mashups and acapellas being dropped from time to time. This was the work of a setup consiting of Traktor Pro w/ 4 decks loaded, Xone 1D, Xone 2D. Respect! This guy KNOWS his shit! The music continues to get my fat ass to shake. I am being turned into a live entertainment. My ass gets groped again. By women. Good Lord, that was relief!
I approach the DJ and high five him in respect to his track selection and proper mixing skills. I took out my iphone and quickly typed "Awesome tech-house & techno man!"
He chuckled in gratitude to the compliment and continued to blast out more and more deep/tech house, techno, and a bit of melodic techno. This was absolutely amazing! The kid truly knew how to pump up the crowd with repetitive music (yes I do admit techno is repetitive). The more he pulled off new tricks, the more I felt the need to express my joy and respect to this dude’s talent.
“This is going to be my second home in Abu Dhabi” I thought. “The place is cozy, the people are not that bad, and the music is groovy! This new resident DJ is awesome!”
The dancing continues and the tracks’ groove intensifies transition after transition (or even mashup).
“That’s it! THAT. IS. IT! I want this guy’s number!! He should play at my parties!! I’ll hook him up with promoters and club owners in Dubai! What the fuck is he doing in Abu Dhabi??” My brain questioned the moment of joy in regards to this DJ’s presence in Abu Dhabi.
*approaches DJ again*
“We need to talk” I profoundly expressed my seriousness “What time do you finish?”
“3:30. Meet me after that
” He responded.After 3 more hours of pumping music, the lights are switched on, people wonder what the fuck just happened, and the horny Englishmen crawl out of the club with their cute Asians.
*approaches DJ*
“Alright man! AWESOME SET!! Finally someone in Abu Dhabi knows what to play! Listen. Give me your number! I’ll hook you up with the hottest parties in Dubai! You deserve far more better!”
Dutch boy laughs “Thanks dude! It was a good night, yeah! I don’t have my phone with me now but I can give you my email”
“Oh it’s fine. I understand. You big DJs and your privacy issues. I understand. I understand.” I responded in slight disappointment at his somewhat possible subtle arrogance.
“No no really man! I don’t have my phone with me.” He continued to convince me
“No worries. What’s the email?”
“It’s info….”
“Info?” I asked in surprise
“Yeah. Give me your phone.”
*types his email down and hands over the phone to me*
I take back my phone and look at the screen. My heart skips a beat. My butt cheeks tighten up together. And my I gulped. Twice.
The words flashed in big bold letters on my screen info@eelkekleijin.com
Mental paralysis. Jaw drop. Piss my pants. Shit my pants. Lose my breath. You name it! All the possible reflexes your brain can command your body to perform occurred in a span of 2 seconds as soon as I read the email typed on the phone.
“OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!! HOLY SHIT!!! EELKE KLEIJIN!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!!??!”
*Eelke laughs out loud*
“IT’S… IT’s… IT’S YOU!!!!”
*points at him*
“DUDE I FUCKING WORSHIP YOU!!! WHY THE FUCK DIDN’T YOU PLAY LOST & CONFUSED???”
“Haha. I don’t know man. Time I guess?”
“OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!”
*left nipple hardens up*
*right nipple hardens up*
*stares at Eelke and smiles*
“GIVE ME A FUCKING HUG MAN!”
*hug*
“Awww! Hahaha! Thanks man!” Blushed Eelke
*stares and smiles creepily at Eelke*
*hugs again*
Made my fucking night! He continued to tell me about his next gig tomorrow in Dubai @ club 360. Oh la dee fucking da! I was trying to hook Eelke with private parties in Dubai. LOL!! PRIVATE PARTIES!!
Oh man! What a surprise hey?
Which brings me to my conclusion. The next Syrian awesome DJ you find playing at a club, is not necessarily Syrian. Could be the next big Dutch DJ. You never know. Not all Syrians are awesome. Maybe Bassel. But that’s about it.
On the other hand, this got me thinking of how awesome it is to attend a gig by some unknown DJ and just listen with no expectations. Like totally detach yourself form the whole “omg what is the tracklist??” and enjoy what gets delivered on the spot. Wasn’t this how things went back in the days? When some dude called Tijs Verwest played in some small club and people danced their asses off to whatever he played? The same thing happened to the Abu Dhabi crowd on Thursday at Above & Beyond’s 2 hour live set. Those kids and sweaty horny men enjoyed the finest trance music ever when in reality they claim that it is too repetitive for them.
So yeah. My thoughts. My experiences. Hope you enjoyed reading and that you would face the same. And if you did, post your experience here.
Pics:
:D! 
i'd say french or swiss!
